Emily // Iron Horse Milwaukee Portrait Session

HEY THERE!

I’m so excited for today’s post. I met Emily in a roundabout way on the internet and I am very thankful to have crossed paths with someone so brilliant and beautiful. She’s a super talented writer so I asked her if she’d be willing to share some thoughts for me to add here, and she was gracious enough to oblige! You can read more of her writing here, and I definitely advise checking it out.

I've found that most people cannot wrap their head around the fact that I actually like myself.

I've had to fight really hard for my own self respect—like, unreasonably hard. I've never understood why society thinks I should hate my body just because it's not the same as yours, but I keep loving it anyway. I love my skinny arms and my crooked back and my muscles that don't want to do much of anything. I enjoy who I am and I do not think disability is a swear word; I think it's a sexy word most of the time. I've been met with a lot of contention for this view, not only in my day to day life but by those closest to me and surprisingly, within the disability community, too. One thing everyone seems to agree on is that it's unheard of for me to love myself as I am, and more than that, it's radical for me to want to be respected as a woman, and not just a woman in a wheelchair.

"Ableism" is a word no one wants to talk about, but it exists in every corner of the world. They think I shouldn't love this, because they couldn't love it. Their internalized ableism has led them to be uncomfortable by my beauty, because they've never seen anything like it before. Above that, they are outraged that I will not allow you to treat me any less; how dare I stand up for myself. How dare she have standards. How dare the disabled woman say "no". Not many can comprehend that I won't settle for the boxes people put me in any longer, and that I don't have to. The truth is, there are people out there with eyes to see my wholeness, and I'm going to stick by them. I don't care to prove anything to anyone any longer. I am going to show up with all of me, and it's okay if you're uncomfortable. Maybe you need to be a little uncomfortable.